8.20.12 Summer Re-cap

School. Tomorrow. WOW! The summer has flown by. Highlights???? Okay, don't mind if I do...
 Chickens, Chitna, Anchorage, Garden, Flowers, Re-plant, Re-plant again (green house blew over, I cried, but picked myself up and planted again...), Minto 1 week!, Cupcake Tuesdays, Baguettes, Dinners, Dates, Birthday Tea Party, BBQ's, Glam Party, Sleepovers, MORE sleepovers, Girl Scout camp drive down and back, FISHING!, reading, kids movie day with kids, birthday parties, weddings, movie release party, (kinda) bridal showers, laughing, dancing in the rain, BRAC 2 testing (genetics... NEGATIVE!!!) tears (a few), Minto fishing for Pike, harvesting, the fair, goat show, cotton candy, 1st place cupcakes, love...LIFE, LOVE. Love you, love me, love you, love me... (I forgot to mention HAIR, Ha!)

8.18.12 OFF...to Minto and beyond

Okay, not really beyond, just Minto, but still!!! Didn't leave until late, got to Minto late, which is the way I like it. Sneak in. Cozy up in our little house. Movie or book, quiet conversation. Cozy. One little room, not a whole lotta stuff to clutter the house. Just what we need if we want to stay a day, a night or a month (minus food). I love it. I mean I LOVE it! I have a night stand next to the bed that has a toothbrush, some books, a sewing kit and mascara. That's all I really need. That and my bible. That's all I need in my life in Minto, because my family is already there. Sometimes at home, in North Pole, my life feels so cluttered, not only with THINGS, but with going and doing and television. It truely is a break for me...Blessed I am to have Minto, and Bill, BJ, Olivia and Elizabeth to share it with. Oh, and Bunny and YOU! love you, love me, love you, love me!

8.12.12 Lessons from the Laundry Room

Here I sit amidst piles and piles of laundry! I mean mountains of this! Lately, I've been looking inward and outwardly at my actions and reactions to things to discover new things about myself. For example, I was looking at these piles of laundry, trying to figure out why this last week has been different. Normally I throw a load of laundry into the wash daily. This may seem like a lot to some, but let me remind you, I have 3 kids (one almost teenager daughter and one pre-schooler), a husband that wears nice clothing to work and has to come home to change to work around the house. So, why in the last week have I neglected to throw a load of laundry in the wash? It only takes a minute, a few minutes to hang up or fold? It could've been I had a busy week, thinking of school starting, the fair, spending some much needed time with my best friend, and we also had a house guest. Bill knows that my cleaning abilities are altered somewhat with house guests. I want to be the Mary (of the story of Martha and Mary). Mary sat at Jesus feet listening to him, paying very close attention to her house guests' every word. Martha stayed in the kitchen cooking, cleaning paying very close attention to the details of meal, the house the home. I neglect my housework for several reasons, the first being (now hang with me if you can), I heard a comment (or two) about housework when you have guests. I took these as negative comments (whether they were meant to be or not, doesn't matter). I then subconsciously told myself, don't do anything... I had fear. Fear of being rejected... see it's easier as humans as people to reject before being rejected. We think we need to be the ones to say good-bye first, to avoid being hurt. I needed to let go of laundry of housework to "seem" (to pretend) I was envolved, when all the while, I was avoiding. Avoiding laundry, avoiding visiting. I was pretending to be Mary to avoid the Martha duties. So is there a balance? Is there a balance between everything? For me there is. It's putting first what I am called to do, who I am called to be. Somedays I am called to be Mary, somedays Martha, and somedays both. God will give me the strength to do whatever it is I am to be doing. The laundry will get done, maybe not ALL of it today, but it will. I just have to make sure it's what I am suppose to be doing. For laundry means I am blessing my husband and my kids. Visiting means I am blessing others and MYSELF. Hey, and by the way if any of you want to come visit next week, please do! Love you, love me, love you, love me...

8.10.12 Donuts Wedding

So... Donuts..My sisters and I, have another sister, Donuts. Mindona. For as long as I can remember they have called her donuts. Today she married her best friend. I am so happy for her! As I sit at the wedding reception music playing, people dancing and laughing, I think of a bride and groom uniting in marriage. There will come a day when the Christian church believes that Christ will return for His bride. So before I lose some of you here...I have been thinking about me, WHO I AM. WHAT I AM DOING HERE. For most of you know I have been baking. My kitchen, my sanctuary. My kitchen-aid, the constant hum, is the prayers deep within me. The smells, incense floating above, raising my thoughts, prayers, hopes and dreams. I love my kitchen, I love creating and making wondrous food for my family and friends. I love to see the smiles on faces and the joy they receive from what I am creating with my hands. Before my diagnosis, I prayed, "God, bless my hands. Bless everything that I create. Let it come from you and give you glory." and it is. I know it is. So lately I doubt who I am. what I am doing. Is being a mother, a wife enough? Is it enough to be a best friend and sister? Is it enough to listen? YES. IT IS. Because it is when I listen, then I can pray. I want to be there for my friends and family. I want to be there and listen. I want to be home when my kids get out of school. I want my husband to share with me dreams, hopes and plans. But first I need to listen. So I tell all of you, I am here. Like a bridesmaid, bride, I am here, ready to listen, ready to be there for YOU. Love you, love me, love you, love me.